Yes But No

"You're a great guy..."
"But...?"
"You're just not my type."


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Back Offputting

"Nice to meet you!"
"I've been warned about you, so..."


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Bar None

"Go home. You've had enough."
"This is my first..."
"And??"


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DUIOU

"Screeching tires, horns blaring, breaking glass... It's all I remember."


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Shot Down and Out

"I don't believe you."
"Why?"
"I just don't."
"Mom....?"
"Don't!"


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Food For Thoughtless

"Is that all you're eating?"
"You're eating all that is."


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Transcendental Separation Anxiety

"What's it like?"
"I'm you, remember?"
"Not any more."
"...wonderful!"


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Transcendental Separation

"What's it like?"
"I'm you, remember?"
"Not any more."
"...lonely."



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Too Much Too Late

"Two sides to every story."
"And yours..."
"...doesn't matter anymore."



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Be Treasonable

"I said good morning??!!"
"And...?"
"Say something!"
"I just did."


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No-show Me

"Meet me at three."
"Cool."
I showed.
She wasn't there.


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Ooh. Burn!

My eyes burned.
"Bleach..."
"Oh. I forgot."
"... Yeah..."
"What?"
"Nothing."


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Blistering Cold Shoulder

He offered his arm. She kept walking. Cold night indeed.

Knowing is Half the Battle Fatigue

"I'm sorry. I didn't know." "Well, you could have asked..."

Double Standard Bearer

"My house, my rules!" "Why don't you live by them?"

Desparity

He finally realized how foolish he had been to hope


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Because And Effect

"Remember the five w's!"
"Whom, which, whence, wherefore, and..."
"Whatever."


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Half Time Out Show

"Stop coughing!"
"I can't, honey!"
"I can't hear the announcer!"

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Dear Life

He felt her slipping.
"I can't..."
"Don't let me.....!"
"NO!!!"


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Underwithstanding

"Ready when you are..."
"I may never be."
"I know."


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Get Off Of My Yawn

"Stop that!"
"What??"
"Yawning! Don't you know those are contagious?"


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Death By Meetings

The speakers droned on.
He fell asleep with every exhalation.


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Eye Sea Ewe

"I'll explain everything."
Three days went by.
Nothing.
He knew.


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Virtue is Impatient

"I can't take it anymore!"
"Why?"
"She hasn't called back!"


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Speechless in the Capitol

"Why do I feel this way?"
"You're human."
"She's so...."


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Solitarium

He was lonely, but not alone.

He wished he were.


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Nowhere Fast

"Take your time."
"Ok... How about now???"
"What's the rush?"


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Entertainmen

"Go play outside."
"But it's raining!"
"Mommy has a... guest."

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Know Thyself Inflicted

"I'm not sorry," he said as he squeezed the trigger.


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Long Time No See You Later

"Hey! It's been a while!"
"Yeah. Not long enough though."


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Search Pattern Baldness

"Can't be done."
"I did."
"Bull!"
"Google me."
"... google ...?"
"Really?"

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Pelican Briefs

She laughed.
"What? These make me look good!"
"Whatever, honey..."



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Meant To Be Or Not To Be

"I guess it's not meant to be."
"What, my happiness?"


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Can't Buy Love

"I need a refund."
"Ok."
"That easy?"
"Not my money."


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Deadbeaten Path

"You mean that's it?"
"Yep!"
"But what about the kids?"


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Happy Ending

"Don't do it!!!"
"Why?"
"You have so much to..."
Bang!!



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Why So Cereal?

"Be happy!!"
"Give me a good reason."
"You're alive!"
"Exactly."

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Complimental Breakdown

"You're not bad looking!"
"Would you date me?"
"..."
"Thought not."


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Elation Deflation

"Eighty? Yay, I passed!"
"No. It's out of two hundred."

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Authoritative Source Code Red

"That's what I said."
"It sounded better coming from him."

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Timbre

A tree fell.
Nobody was around.
It made a sound.


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Heard Mentality

"Speak up!"
"I have."
"But..."
"Why would they care now?"


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Body Language Barrier

The smile.
Too much.
Now she won't talk to me.

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Badly Breaking

"It's the doctor."
"What's the word?"
"Six weeks."
"Honey..."
"Don't."


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Food for Thought

"I've already eaten."
"What about our lunch plans?"
"Go ahead."

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Virtue is Impatient

"She said she'd write back."
"How long ago?"
"Eighteen minutes."


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Hello, Goodbye

"...the way she looked at me."
"How?"
"Nausea inducing disgust."


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Mixed Massages

"It's not what you think."
"It never is. Is it?"


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Your Money Or My Life

"Give me your money!!!"
"No!"
"I'll kill you!!!"
"So?"
"But...."

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Out With The Cold

Shadows danced as the fire died. Death had come prepared.

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Happy Endings

"It's not you..."
"It's me."
"Well, uh..."
"It's ok. Bye."

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Grammaternal Instinct

"Could you pass the salt?"
"It's 'would you.'"
"Would..."
"NO!"

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Pass The Buck Stops Here

"It's not my problem."
"No, it isn't. It's mine. Right?"


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Apologyration

"I'm sorry..." "It's OK..." "... but you know I was right."

New Endings

"But you have so much to live for!"
"I know."


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Thought So

"Are you listening?"
"Yes!"
"What did I say?"
"Uh...."
"Mm-hmm!"


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Dying Breath of Fresh Air

"Tell my wife I..."
"Tell her yourself!"
"... know she cheated."


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Rude Awakening

"Wake up!"
"Mom.....?!"
"On your feet private!"
"Yes drill sergeant!!"


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404 Same Page Not Found

"Why would you say that?"
"Say what?"
"You know what!"


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